via Daily Prompt: Moody
People think I’m moody because I cant hear someone.
People think I’m moody because of my “resting-bitch face”. But in fact its the sheer concentration of trying to lip-read and hear someone.
People think I’m moody because I lock myself in my room for hours at a time, when in reality its because I’m so exhausted from trying to hear and follow the conversation.
People think I’m moody because I prefer to work on my own in silence, rather than sit in a group and struggle to keep up.
People think I’m moody because it takes me 3 days to recover from a day of constant socialising.
People think I’m moody because I don’t move out the way after they say “excuse me” 5 times.
People think I’m moody when they say something for the 3rd time and I just let out a nervous laugh and a wild guess “yeah”.
People who think I’m moody- please understand me when I say it isn’t personal.
via Daily Prompt: Fishing
Fishing for a notion of justice, unable to see through the murkiness. Fishing for a sense of humanity in a whirlpool of hierarchy. Fishing to find the floor of a bottomless ocean. Fishing for a movement, creating ripples in the calm lake. Calmly fishing in the endless storm.
Sooo…today I was in a shop, no background noise and just me and the cashier.
He said to me “Would you be interested in one of our loyalty cards?” So I said “Yeah go on then, why not?”….”Ok” he said, “dfiugiuriun grot9or5iu4hug gruigttr?”
“Sorry, what was that?” I asked
“dfiugiuriun grot9or5iu4hug gruigttr?” He replied.
At this point, I was shaking and sweating profusely. I just wanted to run away and hide forever, but I looked up and then into my purse and just awkwardly laughed. I then plucked up courage to say “sorry I really cant hear you. Could you say that again?”.
I looked at him and he started laughing and looked extremely awkward.
“Please could you tell me your name?”- I just about heard the third time. PHEW.
I really don’t understand why I didn’t just say from the start that I’m deaf. It doesn’t seem like such a hard task for other people but for me it seems to be. Now I’m scared to go in that shop again in case he serves me again, STILL not knowing that I’m deaf.
I’m kicking myself. I even APOLOGISED for being awkward??? I need to seriously work on this deaf thing…
But hey, I have wine. It’s not all bad.
“Please could you face me when you talk to me.”
“Could you speak a little bit slower please”
“Please don’t cover your mouth when you talk. I lip-read.”
“Please come here if you need to talk to me, I can’t hear you when you’re in another room.”
“I can hear you but I don’t know what you’re saying”
“Sorry I don’t understand your accent”